The Ones That Got Away

 There’s been so many posts that I’ve canned-thrown away after the initial paragraph-and I’m not sure why. After all, I love consistency…sometimes. And there’s nothing I hate more than checking a blog and finding that it hasn’t been updated since the last millenium. There are few, very few blogs (I can count them on one hand as a matter of fact) That I take the time to read regularly. One of those blogs is Neil Gaiman’s blog. I’m not sure how he does it, but regardless of how busy he is (and trust me, he seems to ALWAYS  be busy) he updates his blog nearly every day. In my world of upside downs, its nice to know that there’s something consistent somewhere. And the best part is he always has something interesting to talk about. Maybe I’m biased-maybe I respect him so much as a writer, that I’m clouded and maybe you won’t find his blog as interesting, I don’t know-Go have a look and see for yourself. I’m well over the moon about the release of Coraline-the book was one of my favorites and  from the snippets I’ve seen of the film, it’s been brought to life beautifully. I envy his ability to do so much and still find the time to blog AND answer people’s questions-He’s a bit of a super hero-well, at least for a nerdy woman who suffers from the Wonder Woman complex and STILL leaves too much undone on her to do list at the end of the day. Maybe its the lack of an assistant that prevents me from scratching 100% off that list every night-maybe I’m just not being Wonder-ful enough-who knows? If I did make wish lists-and no, I don’t have wishlists, not even an Amazon wishlist-(I think I’m the only person I know that doesn’t by the way), then the first wish would be an assistant-someone to listen to my ideas-my careless beginnings (which is the name of the folder that most of my work begins in) and they would not only praise me, but find the nerve to say “Nah, Luci, that doesn’t sound right-something’s missing or something isn’t “flowing” there. FIX IT.”

Man, you have no idea how hard it is to get a good assistant, I swear. My last one-who happened to be my first one-was awesome –most of the time…she brought food to my study when I forgot that I hadn’t eaten for a day, and she didn’t dare break my concentration with small talk when I was hard at work; She did most of the ‘logical’ thinking when my head was in a story or a piece-and let’s face it-an assisstant that will break up with your boyfriends for you-in a very TACTFUL way, is pretty damned hard to come by!  

Of course on the down side, she praised everything-EVERYTHING-I ever did, making her opinion meaningless in the end. We all want to be great, but no one’s ever great ALL of the time, are they? In the end, my assisstant had to go-after a bittersweet half-life long (does that make more sense than it sounds?)relationship, she headed west and I headed into whole new unchartered territories-But I think I’m ready for another assisstant now. Let’s see, they would need to be on call 24 hours…ok, that’s not fair, I realize, so let’s make it 18 hours a day; They would have to enjoy driving-A LOT-for various reasons: sometimes I NEED to be out there-to clear my head and get my ideas organized. Also, I have a kazillion odds ‘n ends things-errands (that word sounds terrible, I know) that I need to have done sometimes. Not to mention if they could manage my bills, and a hundred other things every day, I may actually sit down long enough to finish the things that I keep neglecting. So, yeah, that’s what my number 1 spot would be on my wishlist..

Now, back to the original reson for this post: there’s so many posts that get left behind such as: Way to go Aunt Betty; a post dedicated to the time when my beloved Aunt Betty died unexpectedly (well, as unexpectedly as an 87 year old CAN die). A sad occasion, but her out of town funeral gave me three days of peace that I really needed back in the days when I was still living in a miserable situation with miserable people. You may think the title was in poor taste, but let’s face it- I’m usually distasteful with  the people I love- in a sweet, sincere way (of course) so I doubt Aunt B would have minded. Then there was the Thanksgiving post, the one where I ranted and ranted about the whole holiday being based on the ultimate genocide of the American Indian, but ended the whole posts singing the praises of a homemade holiday curry that would have easily kicked any stuffed turkey’s ass. That one was basically a rewrite of an email to a non-American friend, so it was a great chance to show my unpatriotic tendecies, as if this country, or any other really matters to me anyway… There’s countless abandoned posts, and sometimes I wonder if I should publish them -maybe I will one day, or maybe they’ll remain hidden and unread in my Blog folder sitting on my desktop like a good boy/girl, with the nice Anubis Icon (some strange sign that I should chose Anubis for the icon? Most definitely so, I think.) Maybe, maybe, maybe-believe it or not,  I HATE maybes..

There was several other things I wanted to touch on, like the fact that somehow, I’ve found myself agreeing to go to my Mothers for Christmas dinner. Why? How do I get myself into these situations? How? Well, I open my mouth to say something, to politely decline, and instead something else does the talking for me-THAT’S how!  I keep telling myself that its only for a few hours and there’s going to be unbelieveable amounts of food, and that going THERE  will make me appreciate the fact that I now live HERE. Plus, I AM getting a few nifty gifts, like a new cell phone and some more blank DVDs (which is exactly what a wicked pirate like L needs, right?) Its like I said to D (who was a bit devastated that I’d accepted the invitation to say the least): “Look at it like a job-or a trick even (he didn’t like that analogy so much, I think) You get through a few crummy hours and you get a bit of a reward for your time.”  That’s how I usually look at all rotten, horrible things I need to do from time to time.

Ok, so that’s it for now. Maybe next time, I’ll tell you all about the gifts that I’ve already gotten, (even if the Santas are making me wait until the 25th to enjoy them!) For now, I’m off to work on various Cd gifts that I owe some of you-and a very cool Cd gift that I’m putting up for ALL of you in a few days-because I am such a Phenomenal Woman! (right????)

 Have a blissful weekend, and you’ll hear from me soon-especially if it’s MY turn to do the emailing-and U know who U are…

Wonderful  hugs and sticky sweet stuff…


P.S. Have your read your Maya Angelou lately? If not,  Phenomenal Woman is  a very good place to start and if you like this one, go here

And if you REALLY like her work, maybe its not to late to add her books to your wishlist, right?

Phenomenal Woman
  Pretty women wonder where my secret lies.
I’m not cute or built to suit a fashion model’s size
But when I start to tell them,
They think I’m telling lies.
I say,
It’s in the reach of my arms
The span of my hips,
The stride of my step,
The curl of my lips.
I’m a woman
Phenomenal woman,
That’s me.I walk into a room
Just as cool as you please,
And to a man,
The fellows stand or
Fall down on their knees.
Then they swarm around me,
A hive of honey bees.
I say,
It’s the fire in my eyes,
And the flash of my teeth,
The swing in my waist,
And the joy in my feet.
I’m a woman
Phenomenal woman,
That’s me.Men themselves have wondered
What they see in me.
They try so much
But they can’t touch
My inner mystery.
When I try to show them
They say they still can’t see.
I say,
It’s in the arch of my back,
The sun of my smile,
The ride of my breasts,
The grace of my style.
I’m a womanPhenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That’s me.Now you understand
Just why my head’s not bowed.
I don’t shout or jump about
Or have to talk real loud.
When you see me passing
It ought to make you proud.
I say,
It’s in the click of my heels,
The bend of my hair,
the palm of my hand,
The need of my care,
‘Cause I’m a woman
Phenomenal woman,
That’s me.          





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